Relationships. A Personal Tale.
So, thirteen years ago yesterday, I found out my dad was sent to the hospital for a brain tumor. I hadn't spoken to him in a month leading up to that date, because I was "so busy" moving from Tokyo to Hong Kong, settling in and beginning to date my now-husband.
That was the first time I had ever gone that long not connecting with my Dad, and it took me a while to forgive myself for that lapse - he was my closest confidant and biggest cheerleader.
Turns out he passed away a month after the diagnosis. Sad of course, duh, and yet a blessing to have all that month to process vulnerability and mortality, and share memories and spread love and appreciation. Lucky in a lot of ways.
I thought I dissected and processed everything around what for years was this dark month in the calendar - I swear body cells have a way of retaining memory - and for the most part, my work has released the pain. Yesterday didn't cross my mind as one of The Days, I just knew it was meant to be a chill day of leggings and coffee with a friend.
It's nice to be in a different space, one several steps past the fresh loss space. One where I appreciate the lessons I imagine my Dad would teach me today. One where I am more mindful of keeping in touch with those confidants and cheerleaders in my life, not letting insurmountable time or distance pass.
Because without our connections, without relationships with people we love and admire, what do we really have??
Sending ❤️❤️❤️ to you all!!